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The Chronicles of Ulic
Begin Once More
Saturday, July 15, 2006
it sucks not having an outlet. for stress, i mean. i have all my natural outlets. i just need some people to listen to me, pretend they understand, with no questions asked.
so ya. today kinda sucked (surprise!).
i tried to let my mother know more about myself. by some horrible twist of fate, she cried and well the day just sucked.
so here it is:
what i've been wantin' to tell me mom is essentially this: please just listen to me and what i want to say; acknowledge my meager existence, that i may be a better son and disappoint you no more. i wish to understand all that you want me to. yet still i feel that i am not understood.
this is what i think she interpreted: mom you are so unfair to me you don't love me don't care about me blah blah.
and to top it off, i'm predisposed (by my childhood conditioning) to think that it's my fault. which it probably is.
yeah well life sucks. 'cus i make it suck. sometimes i think if i'm not here, there will be huge loads of problems less for people to worry about. i'm a trouble magnet. whenever i try to help, someone always gets hurt.
so yah.
Dumped At8:20 pm
i AM myself
i am an INTP. look up the mbti website.
typically, that means i am a creative ideas man.
i'm far from typical, though, so being INTP means i am...
cynical
skeptical
sarcastic
insensitive
unfeeling
just downright pessimistic
what i mean to say is, there is no bright side to anything.
but now i'm a lot better. thanks to my significant other. Liss you.
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1 Comments:
Dude. You ain't a trouble magnet. This is a world full o' trouble. Making yourself out to be a trouble magnet is like making a fish out to be a water whore.
That makes no sense.
Anyway, these things come and go. What can I say?
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